Monday, February 23, 2009

Godspeak

I had the most amazing conversation with a stranger. It was a long conversation (turns out I became ular and didn't masuk ward at all today since my paeds preceptor is away) in that dingy, claustrophobic, poorly lit TDM room. With the new TDM pharmacist who just got home to serve after 2 years working (and 9 years studying) in kiwiland.
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I don't know how it happened, but our conversation rapidly progressed into God-talk. She was just asking about the general working environment in this place, and we talked about What Happened on Friday, then wham. She said things that I didn't expect her to say, but they were spot on, she's a perceptive one, and things I needed to hear. "Take courage, and hang in there. I see a potential in you, and I know you are a caring person. You don't have to do big things to make an impact on patient's lives. God grants each person different gifts, so it's true you don't get to resuscitate patients like the doctors, or look after them like the nurses, but you'll be surprised to know that even a smile, no matter how insignificant the act is, can do a lot to make the patients feel better and cared for. Treated like they are human beings and not just a number you need to call out, or just another job that needs to be done. So don't feel frustrated."
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Life is short. Death is certain. Forever is long. I wish I can remember all the things that we said in earnest to each other. I wish I can be articulate and describe to you how much this person has touched my heart today, with her being so unabashedly Catholic and very encouraging. It wasn't awkward at all, opening myself to her. We shared about miracles God has done in our lives, the moments when things got difficult and how we suddenly see the face of God, interior conflicts resolved by prayer. I honestly haven't done this since CSS. She still questions why she got Miri, and why TDM, at which point I told her, I don't know either what God has planned for you here, but I can tell you today, God's plan is for you to cheer up a PRP that you barely even know.
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She really did. I found God in the workplace today, where I need him the most.

3 comments:

van said...

since u can identify and be solemnly impressed with who i'm talking about,

liltots . wordpress . com

such are the sobering, huge-lump-in-throat things that give us strength.

sigh when u write like this i feel so small and in the same breath, part of the thing itself, so encouraged!

(n yr word verification is a proper word. THIS is unusual)

Daphne Maie said...

van,

is that.. is that d?!

now i have tears streaming down my face! i was just wondering how he felt yesterday because he looked very okay, considering how sudden it was.

im SO glad u shared this with me.

Stella said...

I get the whole 'i'm trying to hard but no one notices' until you see the grumpy old woman smile grudingly and say you're the best. :)