Wednesday, August 26, 2009

White noise


If all else fails, I get comfort in the fact that I can consider homemaking and I shall spend my days in supermarket grocery shopping. Quite an appealing thought.
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I'm kidding.
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2 months, 2 weeks and 2 days until the end of provisional year. Things at work are bleh. I feel bleh. I am currently stationed in Accident & Emergency. By my lonesome. Sending an untrained staff to work in the acute setting is one of the unfathomable moves made by powers that be. I breathe uneasy at work because it's that time of the year when logbooks get handed in for evaluation. Shudder.
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But forget that, for I have a life outside of work.
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My significant other is leaving for LSE in 17 days so we're going into LDR Take Two. I try to take things in stride so I'm surveying air tickets. At least I get to return to the UK for a visit within 2 years of leaving it. :)
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I'm feeling out of sorts lately, and I feel like I need to get back in control of my surroundings. I need to be happy keeping my own company. I need to be less complacent and change the things that I can. Be happy, be happy, be happy. I realise that I'm a runaway. I run away from things. Or I just brace myself through unpleasant experiences with the hope that I'll do better the next time around. I can never get the fact that if I want change, I have to roll my sleeves and get to it NOW, not tomorrow morning, not next week, not next posting.
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A challenge would be living a life of simplicity. I have far too many things. Maybe I need to be less clingy on material possessions, comforts, and worldly values to get inner peace. Maybe then the white noise will fade into nothingness.

2 comments:

D said...

ya can't believe we're finishing prp year already...haven't signed my log book for quite a number of stations T_T what do u do in A&E?

cris is leaving already? nice, it would be lovely to go back to UK for a visit..all the best in LDR Take 2 ;)

Stella said...

Go at Christmas.. London is nicer.. and rainer/gloomier :) but then, it would also be the season for christmas sales!! :)